‘We started micro-dosing magic mushrooms – now we’re having the best sex of our lives’

Taking mushrooms for enhancing sex dates back to the ancient Greeks. Photo / 123RF
Around one in a 100 people used psychedelics last year, and studies prove they boost libido. One couple explain why it works for them.
One of the hardest challenges of marriage – and also one of the least spoken about – is maintaining any genuine sexual intimacy over the years.
And like many couples frantically plate-spinning work, kids and generally trying to keep up with midlife responsibilities, Ellen’s* sex life had morphed into something “familiar and comforting – but let’s be honest, rather underwhelming”.
While the 46-year-old was happy in her second marriage to Joe*, after blending their families (her two kids and his one), romance was thin on the ground.
Or, as Ellen puts it: “He’d merrily fart in bed, and I’d pluck my chin in his presence. I wanted us to be sexy, and properly intimate again. Something was needed.”
That “something” was discovering magic mushrooms two years ago.
The Hertfordshire couple are following a trend, it seems, for professional (and presumably often parents) midlifers seeking thrills.
Recreational use of psychedelics is now the highest since records began.
In 2023, according to the Office for National Statistics (ONS), one in 100 people aged between 16 and 59 in England and Wales had taken magic mushrooms – a hefty 100,000 increase from 2020 – numbers driven by midlifers such as Ellen and Joe.
Affectionately known as “mushies”, or “shrooms”, they grow in fields and forests and naturally contain psilocybin, a hallucinogenic substance.
Whether eaten fresh or dried and made into tea, they induce “tripping” effects, similar to LSD. Smaller amounts, however – “micro doses” dropped on the tongue – result in more subtle brain-altering.
“Microdosing is a relatively new phenomenon for people looking to see change in their lives, to lift their mood or get creative juices flowing better,” explains Martha Allitt, the co-owner of the Psychedelic Society.
“The theory behind the art is to take small, sub-perceptual, sub-hallucinogenic doses, so you might have some degree of perception change, such as feeling more energetic or creative or focused or more able to feel closer to your partner.”
Despite their reputation for bringing fun and adventure (even Prince Harry’s had a go) there’s scientific evidence that under medically controlled conditions they can help with depression, anxiety, PTSD and addiction.
And trials conducted earlier this year were the first to show that psychedelic drugs can also enhance libido.
Taking mushrooms for enhancing sex is nothing new.
“There’s evidence dating back to the ancient Greeks that magic mushrooms can make couples more caring and intimate,” says Professor David Nutt, a neuropsychopharmacologist at Imperial College London.
He would like to see the illegal status of these drugs reviewed and believes it could help many of our relationships.
“It might significantly reverse the current, far too-high rates of divorce,” he adds.
In a bid to inject fun back into their marriage, it was tech-savvy Joe who navigated the dark web to illegally purchase a bottle of tincture costing £230 ($495).
It arrived, discreetly packaged, in the normal post three days later.
“Somehow it felt more grown up and less seedy than those ridiculous middle-aged people munching on cannabis gummy bears,” says the Tory-voting headhunter.
In the UK, magic mushrooms are class A drugs (sharing a category with heroin and cocaine). Regardless of whether the fungus is freshly picked from a field or dried or stewed, possession is illegal.
The fact that offenders could face seven years’ imprisonment and unlimited fines unsurprisingly made Ellen – a senior pharmacist who leads a team of health workers – nervous.
“God forbid if my colleagues knew. I’d be sacked,” she admits.
“But Joe has done his research and we were both excited to try it for the first time when we had the house to ourselves.”
Instead of popping the cork on their normal Friday night fizz, they opened the serum-sized glass brown bottle, and each put two tasteless drops on their tongues.
“After about half an hour we were more smiley, fuzzy-feeling and quicker to giggle. When we hugged I thought how nice Joe smelled, how his kiss on my neck gave me lovely tingles. Every sense was heightened. A small touch was heavenly.
“We ended up passionately French kissing, in a way that you just don’t normally do in your 40s. And had really sensual sex with lots of eye contact.”
“It was really amazing just how close I felt to Ellen,” says Joe.
“And the benefit of not boozing meant there was less risk of ‘brewer’s droop’ which most men will relate to. And no hungover anxiety in the morning.”
Psilocybin has the effect of making our brain activity more malleable, and rewiring neural patterns and ways of thinking, says Tommaso Barba, a scientist at the Centre for Psychedelic Research at Imperial College London.
“There are several networks in our brains which are usually fairly rigid in the way they communicate with each other; what the drug does is make them more flexible.
“When there’s more integration, they become potentially open to change, and that means our perceptions open out and we can become more flexible and open to change,” explains Barba.
“Psilocybin increases emotional empathy,” says Allitt, who’s interested in how the drugs might benefit mental health as well as their interaction with women’s health.
“If people can understand more easily how others feel with this increased emotional empathy, it really helps people’s ability to connect with each other in the context of sex.
“Brain scans have shown how it can stop people ruminating in their own heads by disrupting neural pathways that allow the same negative thought patterns to circulate on repeat.
“Our default brain networks are typically associated with the ego – when thoughts, whether negative or positive, are on ourselves it blocks our ability to be in the moment with others,” Allitt explains.
“It can help people to feel more conscious of being in their own body (and not just in their head) which can feel like an almost spiritual experience for people who normally struggle with feeling that.
“But users also report an increasing sensitivity of physical sensations, such as nice tingling, or touch being more sensual, which can usually improve sex,” she adds.
Allitt also makes the point that two of the biggest enemies to healthy sex lives are mental ones – depression and anxiety. “And there’s plenty of evidence for psilocybin’s ability to rewire neural pathways and help with those.”
Stress, a common reason for sex lives going down the pan, can also be relieved.
“Brain scans have shown that after taking psilocybin there was a reduction in the amygdala, the part of our brain that reacts to negative stimuli and generates the flight or fight (stress) response,” Allitt adds.
“If you’re stressed it’s easy to become defensive with your partner, so taking that away can only improve a relationship and make intimacy more likely to unfold.”
Following observational trials, Barba found that in the weeks after taking the drugs “people reported improved physical and emotional pleasure and communication during sex” and these benefits appear to have had a cumulative effect lasting several months.
He adds: “They also reported increased satisfaction with both their partner and with their own physical appearance.
“This suggests that if a person’s own perception of their body is positively enhanced, so too is the desire for intimacy.”
Dr Anna Machin is an evolutionary anthropologist and the author of Why We Love: The New Science Behind Our Closest Relationships.
“Sex promotes intimacy because it involves touch and orgasm – both of which are major releasers of the key bonding hormones oxytocin and beta endorphin,” she explains.
“The more we release these chemicals, the more we want to, hence if we are prompted to initiate sex – by mushrooms for example – the more we will want to, as beta endorphin is addictive. Both of these chemicals make you feel euphoric, calm and deeply loving and have a positive impact on your mental health.”
Two years after first trying microdosing, Ellen and Joe are on their third bottle of tincture. They don’t use it every time they have sex, only a twice-monthly “treat” which “feels very special” thanks to their subtly heightened senses and more intense emotional connection.
Joe notices that the sex itself feels “more loving and meaningful” (and yes, more orgasmic, too). Which brings wider benefits to their married life.
Barba is currently recruiting couples who use the drug for another observational trial. While he’s excited about how positive the results have been thus far, he warns that all drugs carry a risk – and it can be hard to predict a bad reaction.
“Suffering paranoia, extreme anxiety, or a loss of reality can happen, and it can feel very disturbing,” says Barba.
“While there haven’t been many reported dangers about eating mushrooms with psilocybin,” says Allitt, “eating poisonous ones could make you extremely unwell indeed, or even die”.
Stomach cramps and diarrhoea are also possible.
And not everyone will experience increased empathy. Some others have reported increased introspection “which may not be helpful in the context of sex,” admits Allitt.
Albeit these risks are reduced when microdosing, but Allitt urges anyone wishing to experiment with psychedelics to carefully consider where, when and whom they’re with.
“Even very small doses have the potential to bring up intense emotions, and they can activate the fight or flight response which may lead to anxiety.”
While shrooms aren’t as addictive as other drugs, Ellen admits it’s now become one regular habit she can’t envisage ever wanting to quit.
“Why would I? I never imagined I’d have become a recreational drug user as a mother in her 40s,” she says.
“But nor did I expect to be having the best sex of my life. I can’t see why I’d ever give it up.”